The current mood of bluelucy at

Watching: The Jeffersons

Thinking: God, I can't function!

Feeling: overwhelming love

19/02/2007 - 3:31 a.m.

All About Daniel (pretty much)

Well, first off all, I can barely function anymore. I swear, all I can think about is Daniel. All I care about is Daniel. I mean, I can do stuff. I'm going about my daily life fine, but, I don't know how to say it. Every moment I can't see him is spent passing the time waiting to see him, hear him, experience him to the best of my ability. That's it.

You know, I believe I have over a hundred entries where I mention my angel, not even including the ones where I didn't yet realise how important he is to me.

Also, I don't think I ever said how I didn't have a crush on Michael at all. I believe I just said I probably didn't. Yeah, though. I never did. Michael is awesome, but the way his personality is, I'm not attracted to him like that, you know. I wouldn't have even become attracted to Daniel consciously if I hadn't seen his personality, which of course I was goign to, it being fate and all, but yeah, I wasn't attracted to him physically at first. I had to see that he has the sort of personality which appeals to me before I became attracted to his looks. Again, Michael doesn't have the sort of personality which is attractive to me as far as getting a crush or falling in love with someone. He has a friend sort of personality to me. It may seem odd that I don't think he's cute, considering, but just because someone looks a lot like someone else doesn't mean you'll like them as well. At least for me, personality plays a big part, and I don't see Michael and Daniel the same way at all. Again, let me emphasise that I totally have no problem with Michael as a person. That would be pretty pathetic if you think about it. You can think someone is way cool, though, and not be attracted to them in a romantic way. So, yeah. Of course, even other guys who are romantically attractive to me are not anywhere near as attractive to me as my Daniel, but well, yeah, I suppose that goes without saying.

At any rate, I also said before that I'm gong to say Daniel is Jewish. Well, that's stupid. I mean, I really don't think he's Jewish at all. Unless he converted, but there's no indication of that. He's never shown that he could be (I think agnostic would be the word that fits him best as far as religion goes overall), and I really don't think he's Jewish by tradition of nationality, as in being Hebrew. I mean, neither his last name or his mother's maiden name is Hebrew. Also, far be it from me to engage in stereotyping, but let's face it, Jewish men, in general, tend to be on the hairy side, and Daniel is not very hairy (which causes me to be quite frustrated with the idea that a man who doesn't have hair on his chest is somehow "less of a man"). I know that doesn't necessarily mean anything, but it could certainly be an indication given everything else. Yeah, though. He's English and Dutch by ancestry, but not Jewish at all as far as I can see. Of course, I don't know why I wanted him to be then, why I said I was just going to say he is when there's little indication of that possibility. I was already consciously in love with him when I said that, so I don't know. It was stupid. I don't care what religion or nationality or whatever he is. I mean, I love what he definitely is, and I don't care to say he should be something, or pretend he's something I'm not certain he is. That's just stupid.

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