The current mood of bluelucy at www.imood.com

13/09/2007 - 6:18 p.m. to 6:58 p.m.

Watching "The Changeling"/Watched "Unending"/I Just Need Him To Be Happy


Thursday

I'm watching "The Changeling" right now. Daniel's not on yet, so I can pay attention and not necessarily have to see the screen, you know.

I watched "Unending" for the first time on DVD about an hour before my favourite episode was on SciFi. God, that episode always gets me so emotional. I didn't want to watch "The Changeling before seeing all of my favourite season 10 episodes on DVD. So, yeah.

I have something else to say, but I can't think as Daniel's going to be on in like less than a minute.
Okay, it's a commercial. You know, the more I love Daniel, the more important his happiness to me. I mean to say, the less bothered I am when someone makes him happy besides me. I mean, I don't think he needs anyone as it stands now, and... Hold on. The Commercials are close to over, I think... Yeah, they were just ending. I'm so good! Anyway, as I was saying, I'm sure that ultimately, I'll be the one he's happiest with (and I don't mean that in a vain way, as I've said before; I mean, we're soul-mates), but if he loves someone else, and is happy with them and all, in the meantime, that is wonderful. I can't dislike someone he loves, who makes him happy. Even if it turned out, as hard as it would be, that I could never be with him, or that somehow I wasn't for him, which makes no sense whatsoever, of course, but this is just for argument's sake. Yeah, the point I'm driving at is whoever he ended up with in this scenario, I would be truly happy, because he would be happy.
Of course, the acid test is Sha're. If I can watch that one scene where they're together, and everything’s fine still, in "Children of the Gods", and not feel any jealousy, then I know I've conquered that. Oh, I love this scene even though Daniel isn't in it, and he's coming up really soon, anyway. Hold on. Okay, I'm a little pissed off because I was looking for my lip gel, and I accidentally looked away while Daniel was on. It was only for a second, but I hate not seeing him for even that short a time. Well, I did see him a lot in the last scene, and he's on again. It just frustrates me when I do things like that. I feel really stupid, but I have OCD, so there you are. It's not going to keep bugging me, but I'm glad it wasn't the end of the episode. Honestly, though, I don't think I'd be that stupid. I have about five minutes now, so I'll finish up by noting that I have thought about whether seeing Sha're with Daniel all like would make me jealous, and I don't feel like it woul, but I have to actually see it, you know, to be sure.

Getting - Better

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