A Day InThe Life

The current mood of bluelucy at www.imood.com

Listening: to "What A Feeling" from Irene Cara ("Flashdance" theme)

Thinking: Daniel is real! I don't care if I sound crazy for realising that!

Feeling: epiphanised

28/07/2007 - 5:22 p.m.

Dreams/Epiphany

Okay, I've had a few dreams recently involving Daniel, even thinking that he's not real. The first dream was a bit unusual at first. I was a guy, but I don't think it was any sort of past life experience. I was in a locker room with showers, naked, and there were all these other guys around me, also naked, and this was not embarrassing at all, though I felt young and anxious about a new situation, well, eager is probably the better word. I felt younger than 29. Still unless my mind handles past lives sometimes through a way where I see things more recently, as well, but in this dream, Daniel looked just how he does now. Anyway, there were showers to the side, and this hall I was in, and to the side of me there were guys showering, and they were those showers with the plastic frosty doors, you know. There were also guys ahead of me, but they were all to the side, except Daniel, who was right ahead of me, maybe seven feet away (and yes, he was in his birthday suit like everyone else). I must have been gay in the dream, because I felt about him the way I do when I'm awake, the way I feel about him in every dream, either that or it was a fluke thing where there was one guy I was attracted to. I'm not sure because I wasn't exactly paying a lot of attention to any of the other guys. Anyway, later I was a chick again, and some stuff happened that I don't want to get into, but would have been a lot nicer if for one, it had lasted longer, and if for another, there hadn't been some guy watching us. I have no idea what that was about. It was still incredible, though, as it is whenever I dream about that, even though it is just a dream.

So, the next dream I had, Daniel and I were with these two other girls and this other guy, and Daniel and I were a couple, incidentally. So, there was this one part where there was this drain pipe, I guess you'd call it. One of those huge ones you can easily walk through, and there were electrical wires running across it. The other guy when to walk in there, and the two girls were following him. One was a bit farther away, and one was right behind him. Daniel and I were about ten feet away, on this grassy area. I was closer to the guy, though, by around two and a half feet. Well, the guy stepped on one of the wires and was electrocuted. It shook all of us up a bit. The girl just behind him almost stepped on the wire, too, but she managed to step back in time. I don't know why I dreamt that, but I was thinking about it, and it seems like the guy who was elecrocuted, and the guy I was mentioning from my other dream, were the same person. I guess he died, so to speak, but yeah, I don't know if he was some sort of metaphor, or what. I wish I could figure that out, but oh, well.

So, my latest dream involving Daniel didn't technically involve him, but it's still the one I would say is the epiphany dream. Okay, I was dancing in my room, listening to "What A Feeling", and I know that song is about dancing, but if you think about the way the words are, they can make sense for my situation. So, yeah, I was dancing, listening to the song, thinking about the words, looking at all of the pictures on my wall, and when I woke up, I remembered that, and I just knew. I should also point out that I was going to sleep on my Daniel "pillow", and I thought that if I do, and I dream about him, it will just be because I was sleeping on the "pillow". Of course, you could say that the only reason I dreamt this is because I was thinking about it, but I'm not so sure. I usually think something along those lines as I go to bed, and I haven't had an epiphany sort of dream before. So, yeah, you know. I don't care if it isn't logical. I don't care if it doesn't make sense. Every part of me is saying Daniel is real. I can not deny that. I'm just going to accept that he's real, and if I dream about him not being real, then I'll go ahead and accept that, but so far, everything is telling me that I should have faith, and trust that he really exists, and I don't think there's any harm in that.

Getting - Better